Something More

Christianity points, as is true of all major religions whose basis is love, to something larger, something more wonderful still.  The essence within and beyond the creative energy of the universe.  The energy that beckons us to let it move through us in amazingly creative ways.  The energy that longs to satisfy the deepest yearnings of our soul.

Organized religion falls prey to the same temptations inherent in all communities in the physical world:  will to power and greed.  The idea that for there to be winners there must be losers.  That there must be rules and regulations, doctrine and dogma in order for belief in and worship of a higher power to triumph.

Physical life is an opportunity to allow the energy and creativity in our spiritual center to emerge and function uniquely in the material world through our personality.  The energy of the spirit longs to mimic the activity of its source and thus  become in union with the Ground of Being.

What to Do About Garbage

We know what to do with our domestic garbage: set it on the curb at the appointed time and sanitation workers will take it away.  What about our internal garbage—the kind that seems to increase no matter our attempts at removal?

Perhaps we think we haven’t yet exhausted all our ideas for removing the debilitating mess of resentment and unresolved grief inside us.  Perhaps we think our angry tapes will simply self-destruct if we have enough patience.  Perhaps we’re practicing detachment from our guilt and shame and hoping that will work.

The truth is we cannot by our own power rid ourselves of what has come between us and the Kingdom of God.  We cannot set out on our spiritual curb a container of what separates us from the peace of God.  Our spiritual garbage is none other than what scripture refers to as sin.

The psalmist declares that once God washes us, we become whiter than snow.  The psalmist does not declare, however, that we are able to wash ourselves.  If we were able to cleanse ourselves of our spiritual garbage, we might decide we had no need of God.  God wants us to need him to effect the miracle of cleansing and transformation.  And God wants us to participate in that miracle.

Ann Glover O’Dell

6 august 2018

 

Eggs and Rabbits

Easter traditions abound all over the world, and they vary from culture to culture.  Often  people who observe them do not know their origins, but something in the individual and collective psyche of the people embraces and celebrates the traditions each year. Usually people don’t  think much about them until some visitor asks.

In the West some of our Easter customs are even rather contradictory.  Rabbits don’t lay eggs, yet every Easter the Easter Bunny brings them to fill children’s baskets on Easter Eve.

Germans immigrating to US brought the idea of the rabbit as the spring symbol of reproductivity.  And they are also believed to be the ones who brought the idea of colored eggs.  An ancient Teutonic legend states that the rabbit was originally a bird and was transformed by Oestre (Ostara, Eastre), the goddess of spring, into its present form.  In gratitude for his transformation, the rabbit laid beautiful eggs each spring in honor of her festival. Our word Easter  comes from her name.

Rabbit and egg give a double symbol of new life–and thus are exactly right for us.  Some of us  seem to need to be told twice–and in unusual metaphors.  Trouble is, we seem to have lost our desire to investigate the metaphor.  It sometimes takes internationals coming to this country to inquire as to why we engage in such a strange ritual, and even then some of us are content just to admit we simply don’t know.

Rabbit is an ancient symbol not only for fertility–since it reproduces so quickly–but also for the divine.  This idea comes from ancient Persia to Africa and was brought to us by the slaves–in the stories of Br’er Fox, Br’er Bear, and Br’er Rabbit.  Br’er Fox and Br’er Bear have great schemes for capturing Br’er Rabbit, and often do, but Br’er Rabbit’s wit always serves to save his life.

The rabbit is one of few animals that has no natural defense system and is easy prey for larger carnivores.  But in some cultures it’s the very vulnerability of the rabbit that appeals as a symbol for the divine–the idea that God doesn’t come as king of the beasts but as a defenseless creature. The rabbit is a timid, harmless, peaceable creature, who will not retaliate, no matter the provocation.  It has teeth similar to rodents but will never bite, not even in self-defense.

The egg has been used throughout history as a symbol of new life.  And today  in Eastern Europe Orthodox Christians exchange red eggs at Easter as a symbol of their faith, new life, and joy, red symbolizing the blood of life.  In a number of countries the decorating of eggs has evolved into a painstaking and beautiful art form.  Pysanky is a time-honored folk tradition, established in the Ukraine, handed-down from one generation to another, whereby intricate and beautiful designs in color and wax are painted on the shells of raw eggs. The wax seals the porous quality of the shell and eventually the egg dries up.

We need  dig only a little into the soft soil of symbolism to discover that the Easter Bunny is much like St. Nicholas–a metaphor for the God who has good gifts for us–and the egg–representing new life–is one of the special ones.  A passage from Luke has Jesus comparing the kinds of good gifts we give our children to the gifts God has for us.  The lesson is that even though we can identify what are gifts good enough for our children, we cannot imagine all the good gifts God has in store for us.

In addition to everything else the Jesus narrative tells is the GOOD NEWS that we are EASTER EGGS–each one of us unique and precious, a gift from God.  And each of us has a new creature–God’s holy creature, our original being, inside, wanting, trying to hatch out.

Some of us are a lot like the Orthodox Christians who paint over the shells of their Easter eggs.  We are porous, vulnerable creatures, and we’ve tried to make our shells impervious to cracks, nicks, anything that might penetrate and further damage the already wounded  self we know ourselves to be.

But there are individuals who have had egg-cracking, hatching out experiences.  They identify with Humpty Dumpty but recognize they don’t need to be put back together because something wonderful has emerged.

The Ukrainian Pysanky eggs dry up eventually.  If one of those eggs is kept safe from cracks, the yolk and white eventually dry up and the egg has almost no weight. We may get to a point where we feel life drying up within us.  But God has a better idea for us than that.  The Resurrection narrative tells us the shell must be destroyed so that new life can emerge.

Jesus was trying to patch up the brokenness of the world’s shell–by preaching, teaching, touching, healing, performing miracles.  But that was not enough.  God’s design was to show the world the human Easter Egg–whose body/shell,  cracked and broken, opened the way for new life to emerge.

Whether we believe in the Easter Bunny is not the issue.

Whether we believe in John 3:16 is not the issue (For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believed in him should not die but have eternal life).  The issue for us is the Easter Egg and the question it presents:

Do we want new life–in this flesh–in this body–enough to cooperate with the new creature within us that is trying to hatch out? to cooperate in stop trying to glue the cracks in our shell? to stop trying to paint over the vulnerable parts and protect ourselves from further wounds?

The spiritual pain and psychological agony in our lives is telling/begging us to quit gluing and patching and let the birth–the hatching out take place.  This new creature within is like a little chick who has developed inside the egg shell.  The chick must grow until it has a beak strong enough to penetrate the shell–from the inside out.

See how God likes to do the opposite of what we imagine.

Think about eggs this Easter season.  Think about yourself as an egg–-with a beautiful new creature inside ready to hatch out. Think about yourself , already a beautifully decorated egg, having something even more beautiful inside that wants to emerge.  Think about the real you pecking against the shell–from the inside.  Think about letting your egg shell crack open and the new creature hatch out.

Ann Glover O’Dell

March 2002

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Room for a Baby

Sometimes babies are born in the most unusual places: a subway station, the back seat of a taxi, the corner of a crowded restaurant.  We never know where a baby might choose to make his appearance into the world.

The pregnant mother makes all possible preparations, packs a little suitcase for her trip to the hospital, or lays out all that will be needed when the midwife arrives.  A little nursery is made ready, a place for the infant to lie safe and warm.  If there are available funds, colorful decorations are hung to attract the infant once his eyes are able to focus.

But all the time no one knows exactly when the baby will decide to be born—or how much in a hurry he will be to get here.  Sometimes the mother has no time to travel to the clinic or wait for the midwife.  She is not able to make the baby postpone his appearance but rather must cooperate with this child who is eager to become a citizen of this earthly kingdom.  Babies generally have their own time-table and will not be thwarted in their determination.

The godchild within us is indeed one of those with a birthing mind of its own.  We absolutely cannot predict when God will bring our transformed spirit into our conscious awareness.  It is God’s secret, meant to reinforce his design and determination to have his way, to act on his own time schedule.  And it matters not whether we have made any preparations at all.  In fact, our ability to make any preparations is highly unlikely.  This birth is God’s surprise for us, the best Christmas gift ever, whether it comes on December 25 or any of the other 364 days available.

Ann Glover O’Dell

18 December 2017

Be!

When God’s voice said, “Be!”

and all the guilt and anger in me vanished

I began to know as I am known—

to understand in deepest heart

that what our mind has told us we must do

can never be divine directives

because our mind attempts to be God,

not listening for his holy will.

When God said, “Be!”

He gave me new relationship

where tasting, feeling, sensing

takes precedence to thinking and deciding.

When God told me to be

I became a born again as Jesus once described

those apprehending life’s abundance.

 

Ann Glover O’Dell

20 November 2017

Accessing Creativity!

I’ve been trying to find a way to help children (and adults!) access their creative center in order that they might find what will inspire their spirits and give them passion for living.  I’ve been thinking of creative folks who have found their passion and who might inspire young people to search for their own.

But I’ve had it all wrong!  Creative people as would-be role models might do little more than increase the apathy, rage, and depression already dominating in many youth who may have already despaired of ever finding anything to bring them lasting joy.

The secret is to allow the creative center to express itself in us.  And centering is the means by which we request and cooperate with our creative self which seeks to express itself benevolently and uniquely in every human being.

The quiet time of centering can be called calming time or peace-seeking—a time to detach from thoughts and feelings and relax all consciousness while sitting in a comfortable position.

Choosing a special word that expresses one’s intention is important and should be carefully undertaken.  Invoking that word when the mind begins to wander down the stream-of-conscious will help to keep one focused.  The word can be silently repeated as often as necessary.

Regular daily quiet time is necessary to achieve desired results.  Gradually amazing changes will be noticed in one’s personality.  Exciting ideas will begin to come forth.  Little by little transformation takes place and joyful creativity emerges.  A journal would be a good companion so one can begin to chronicle results.

Transmitters of Energy

Could it be possible that we, as transmitters of the energy of the universe, can enable that energy to multiply as it travels through us?

I like to think so.

First of all, we need to embrace the idea that this energy is a benevolent one, that it seeks our good and the good of all.

Recalling surprising coincidences can begin to show us how that energy can work to make our lives more enjoyable—and give us the desire for more of its miracles.  We may not be able to specifically direct the action of this universal energy, but we can tell it what we want: to be open to its activity within us and its guidance of our choices.

Second, we need to find ways of opening ourselves to its coursing in and through us, ways of inviting it to work its goodness using us as its vehicles.

The Window of My Mind

I  washed the window of my mind

and sitting on the sill, looked out

for views of inspiration from my muse.

Parades gave me nothing as they passed

and wondered I where else to cast my eyes.

Suddenly a fine wind blew the casement open

and circulated dizzingly within

upsetting applecarts of art work

and opinions collected

during years of trips and education

contributing to theologies tried and true.

This fine wind sifted through it all,

blowing the stale and stagnant

into ingenious incinerators

then distributed assorted rainbows

as it exited toward the sea.

 

Ann Glover O’Dell

13 February 2017

The Zeal of the Lord

 

“The zeal of the Lord of hosts will do this.” (Isaiah 9:7)

            Zeal indicates to me great energy, enthusiasm.  The “zeal of the Lord of hosts” says to me that God’s great desire is to bring forth something special—someones special—you and me.

            In spiritual terms this suggests the bringing forth of the new being in each being, the full being, combining both human and divine natures.

Scripture doesn’t say the Lord wishes this were so or hastens to ask man to effect the desired outcome.  No, Scripture says the Lord will do it—will do it through His zeal.  An additional promise from God, suggesting an additional covenant initiated by God.  A covenant with the articulated response on man’s part: that God be allowed to carry out His desire.  The individual  freely chooses to cooperate with the process. God asks us to give permission, just as did Mary in the Nativity story, out of our free will, to let Him use our spiritual womb.

The ‘Savior’ is the part of our personality that transforms us by dying.  The ‘Savior’ is the best we know ourselves to be—the part that needs to offer itself to God in order that God might accept it, purify it, and return it to us as part of the best He knows us to be.

23 December 2014

 

Christmas Meditations

On this website under Meditations I have posted nine dealing with Christmas themes.  I hope you will want to take a look at some.

Doxology

Praise to Thee, O Lord, Creator of the Universe,

Who brings forth from your earth womb all life.

Praise to Thee, O God, Sustainer of the Universe,

who gives life the abundance Thou designed for it.

Praise Him who places godhood

in the center of our being.

Blow Holy Spirit, Wayward Wind,

with all thy special power

come stir again the old desire

in us who yearn to flower.

Rain into us the fullness

of the morning dew

made into streams

that penetrate our roots.

Make green the carpet of our days

that we, lured into verdancy,

might sprout new buds

and bloom as never even

once upon a time we dreamed.

Press down upon us sunshine

of the vision in your mind

of who we were and are and yet to be,

always within the firm embrace

of thy mysterious trinity.

Ann Glover O’Dell

30 May 2002

Poems for Peace (remembering 9/11)

HOW CAN WE BE AT PEACE?

How can we be at peace when

spirit’s doors are locked against it?

Locked and bolted ‘gainst

we know not what for the

unknowing makes us fearful still.

Fearful of whatever lies beyond

paltry presumption of control

beyond concentrated consciousness

that knows so little

understanding even less.

Fearfulness that lies in wait

albeit quite against its will

for frequent fear is nonetheless

predictable and anxious huddling

in its womb is still more

to be desired than any sort

of openness to expectation’s

swaddling cloths of vulnerability.

How senseful that our fear

that chronic lodger

continues welcome with its stale

foul breath and stained attire

when we the landlords

with our legalese

could if we dared

advertise our “rooms to let”

and interview new prospects

always with the veto power

tightly clutched  within our ring of keys.

Ann Glover O’Dell      19 April 2004

 

NOT AS THE WORLD GIVES

‘Not as the world gives’

is your peace you said

yet we would be

content just now with

what the world defines

since such unpeacefulness abounds

we cannot entertain the notion

of a state within

when  all about us

life’s demise looms large.

 

Power plays take center stage

and those rehearsing roles

soon star in great performances

surprising e’en themselves

with prowess and precision patterning.

 

Oh greed where is thy pain

which piercing self to inner well

of generosity so makes our

substance sharing

more to be desired

than much fine gold?

 

Where is the understanding

of that peace not understood

by mortal minds but mandates

light’s deep penetration of the

soul’s storehouse of truth?

Is there a spirit energy

encased within your peace

propelling us

to show the world the way?

Ann Glover O’Dell   20 June 2004

 

BLESS AGAIN!

Oh, One, who once in time blessed

world with your creation

who promised greater blessing

to  begotten and beloved

who blessed with beckoning finger

a journey from the known into adventure

who blessed with ripe womb fruit

the barren and despairing

then tested trust by bid  progenicide

who staged new blessing by surprise deception

dishonor and a wrestling match

who blessed by  rank denial the boons requested

and blessed again with secret benediction

the ones you named your one and only ones.

 

Oh, One, come bless again!

o’erturn the graves of hatred

revive still births of spirit

spill out the coffers’ gold.

 

A Jubilee we seek, we need

where all now cleansed and shining

is ready for the new creation song.

Ann Glover O’Dell   4 June 2002

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

GOD’S COMPASSION

As one of the primary attributes of God, compassion is also one of God’s greatest gifts to us.  The more intimate our relationship to God becomes, the more compassionate we become in our relationships with others.

Compassion suggests a great deal more than sympathy or empathy.  Compassion means to passion with, to share the passion of the other—be it fear, pain, sorrow, or despair.  The word has its roots in the womb work of reproduction.  When we are compassionate, we participate in the creative work that each kind of passion produces.

What an opportunity we have each time we allow our innate wombedness to participate with another’s.  Something of God’s goodness is sure to result.

We Are God’s Christs

Jesus is everyman. Jesus is us.  He makes mistakes.  He becomes angry.  He needs quiet time.  And all the while he is trying to minister to others in the way he believes God is calling him to do.

Jesus truly cares about others, and his compassion is shown in many examples throughout the gospel stories.  He also recognizes his need for companions, for close friends, and for time to examine his own motives and goals.

Aren’t we like Jesus?  Haven’t we set out to make ourselves into the best child of God that we can be?  Aren’t we showing compassion and generosity to our fellows as we are able?  And don’t we recognize our need for community and enrichment and ways to keep our bodies and minds and spirits healthy?

I think yes.

So what is lacking?

What is lacking is our awareness that we are God’s Christs.  We recognize our humanity.  In fact, sometimes it is too much with us.  What we don’t experience and can’t find in all our thinking, reading, talking, acting, and even praying, is our divinity–the experiential realization throughout our entire being that God takes delight in dwelling within us, and that we are useful to God simply by being his holy, cherished Child.

So how do we achieve the goal of experiencing divinity within humanity?  We might begin with a letter to God–asking the genuine questions we may not have ever before put in writing.  See what happens.  My hunch is that God would welcome a dialogue with us.

My experience is that God wants our participation, our cooperation in this miracle of making us know we are his Christs.

(Note: a personal story of experiencing divinity is available on this website under Book)

Fasting

Fasting puts us more in tune with the Spirit of God whose food is not the meat and drink our bodies require.

St. Augustine suggests the ancient directive to wash the face and anoint the head has to do with the inner man even more than the outer—the necessity of washing away whatever stands in the way of our experiencing God and being re-transformed into his image. The anointing reminds us that there is a divinity deep inside us which connects us irrefutably with God.

“Often, too reflection upon the things we need for carrying on this life injures the eye of our spirit and bedims it; and . . . divides our heart.”

Jesus said one lives by the words that come from the mouth of God. How do the words of God come to us? From his Spirit to our spirits. Through silence. Through intuition. Through insights. Far more than any printed page.

WINNERS VS LOSERS

In all areas of life there looms the competitive force which declares that for there to be winners, there must be losers. The idea that everyone can win seems missing. Even in sports, no game is allowed to end in a tie.

The 1970s produced a number of simulation games which immediately became popular with high school and college students. The name of one game was “Win As Much As You Can.” Players were divided into several teams. Each team elected a representative who would meet with other team representatives in a sort of summit where each would cast a vote for the decision his team authorized.

After the designated number of rounds, scores were totaled and the winning team announced. At the end of the game the players were stunned to discover that the only way they could win the most was to help the other teams win as well.

What causes us to think that for us to be a winner someone has to be a loser? How might we work toward the goal of everyone becoming winners?

A clergyman who was accosted by a parishioner, accusing him of not believing in hell, asked the woman, “Madam, how many people would have to go to hell for you to be satisfied?”

The great Energy of the Universe is a benevolent energy that wills the good, the true, and the beautiful for all. May we attune ourselves to the music of that energy.

THE ERA OF THE HOLY SPIRIT

Many clergy and biblical scholars are busy researching the cultural context of the four Gospels and the source material used. We even have reports, based on serious scholarship, of what Jesus probably did and did not say. Eager readers seem to want to know what is fact and what is fiction in the four accounts of the life of Jesus.

What seems to be ignored is this new era of holiness. Our individual and collective level of conscious awareness has risen to the point where we are ready for something more. Our inner Self yearns for a new manifestation of the Sacred—a personal revelation.

We have moved into the era of the Holy Spirit. An era to complete the other two. An era in which we are not consumed with research into the written word. An era in which the energy and spirit of the universe is available and eager to move in and through us if we but will it. This energy can reveal to us a truth stronger than words, a new reality that cannot be denied, and potential that is eager to be realized.

Let us consciously invite this amazing phenomenon to come to us, abide with us, and use us as instruments of peace, creativity, and joy.

ANGER

Surely God does not intend for us to be angry. Simply because anger overpowers and imprisons the joy that God has planted deep inside us.

Anger seems to be on the increase as God’s children are killing each other everywhere. And increasing in individual amassing of weapons for the purpose of killing.

Anger seems to arise when there is a feeling of loss of power, of control. It can be something as detailed as a TV set not working properly or can be a general feeling of more than hatred toward a group of people—perhaps coming from a fear that they might become more powerful, might try even to kill us.

What God wants is to eliminate the anger in us—one by one—through a personal transformation experience. Elimination of anger is the only means to our living in harmony with each other, whether in marriage, families, communities, nations.

Anger comes from wanting power, no matter how much we already have. Anger may be a sibling of greed—or surely plays into it. No matter how much power we have, we want more. We want people to behave the way we want them to behave. We want events and outcomes to follow our agenda. We want to be in control.

The drive for power does something peculiar to our insides—both physically and psychologically. It causes negative consequences that actually reduces our power and thus increases our anger.

Anger occupies the space where creativity and authentic excitement for life is intended to live.

We would do well to identify our angry spots and ask ourselves if we really do want to be rid of them. If we do, our Inner Wisdom can destroy what is keeping us from experiencing abundant life. It waits for our permission.

13 August 2014
Ann Glover O’Dell

(Note: my personal transformation story, where anger was destroyed in me and hasn’t returned in 30 years, is contained in the book,  Humpty Dumpty Hatched, which is available on this website.)

COMPASSION

We must die to our agenda for compassionateness before we can be transformed into truly compassionable individuals. Whatever goodness and compassion our conscious will has chosen as a worthy goal and has attempted to achieve must be sacrificed in order that God’s agenda may take precedence—i.e., take complete charge in us. What that means—how God’s agenda is made manifest—is that we participate fully in the consent to, the receiving of, and the putting into action God’s desire.

Having been washed of our own agenda—no matter how good and godly it was—there is space in our conscious will for the Spirit, which now has been welcomed more fully in to our soul, to feed God’s agenda into our consciousness, which, through our continued free will, participates with this agenda through its own creativity, energy, and with its own peculiar talents of organization and execution.

Though the conscious will continues to make decisions, flowing in and through those decisions is the compassionate, creative, renewing, transforming power of the Spirit from our soul space that is continually enlarging ever since we gave the Spirit permission to clean house—not a case of suggesting to consciousness what needs to be discarded or helping to carry off pieces of detritus but to take charge and do the job solely on its own Spirit terms.

Ann G. O’Dell
10 March 2009

(note: The secret to giving Spirit permission to clean house is accessible to everyone in the book Humpty Dumpty Hatched, available for downloading on this website.)

 

CONTAIN ME, GOD

Contain me, God
within the fabric of this flesh
within the scope mind and hand
that I may not be spilled
in heedless acts of mediocrity
and rash expressions of a wayward pride.

Contain me, God
that I not reach too high
or think too deep
and miss the treasure
resting in my hand.

Contain me, God
that I may be
accustomed to the crevices
you’ve made in me
and careful how I fill
the spaces that I find.

Contain me, God
that I great comfort gain
in being cup and liquid both
held by thy loving hand.

Ann Glover O’Dell
11 February 2009

Christianity Points Beyond Itself

Christianity points, as is true of all major religions whose basis is love, to something larger, something more wonderful still. The essence within and beyond the creative energy of the universe. The energy that beckons us to let it move through us in amazingly creative ways. The energy that longs to satisfy the deepest yearnings of our soul.

Organized religion falls prey to the same temptations inherent in all communities in the physical world: will to power and greed. The idea that for there to be winners there must be losers. That there must be rules and regulations, doctrine and dogma in order for belief in and worship of a higher power to triumph.

Spirituality is something else indeed. It speaks of the action of man attempting to access his inner self and the action of the universe helping him do just that.

Physical life is an opportunity to allow the energy and creativity in our spiritual center emerge and function uniquely in the material world through our personality. The energy of the human spirit longs to mimic the activity of its source and thus become in union with the ground of all being, the power behind love.

(Note: an essay linked in theme can be found in “All Our Costliest Treasures Bring” under MEDITATIONS)

Our Secret Garden

Holy Scriptures tell of the Creator placing man in a beautiful garden—the most idyllic place the Creator could provide. Not just beauty but life—growing things—the world of nature’s flora all around. All for man’s authentic  enjoyment. To experience the ripening of all that had been planted.

Our own personal Eden awaits us. Multifaceted beyond imagination. Peculiar to our own personality. The garden of delights spoken of in much poetry and many religions.  A place where creativity abounds.

In Paradise man’s only task was to ‘tend’ it. To ‘till and keep it.’ To ‘cultivate and guard it.’ What a job description! To continue what the Creator had begun! The Creator didn’t say ‘work’ in the garden. He said ‘tend.’ To attend to, serve as an attendant, watch over, foster. Tend involves  a combination of work and play—so satisfying that one would never refer to it as the unpleasant labor we frequently identify as work. So satisfying that it becomes our ‘bliss.’

The ‘bliss’ Joseph Campbell so often  spoke of  exists in our center, in this idyllic garden, the ‘bliss’ we are to discover and ‘follow.’ We ‘follow our bliss’ by tending to the ultimate pleasure that we find in the center of ourselves. Tending to it in a way that enables it to grow, mature, ripen into fruit that others want to share.

Our Secret Garden is individual, unique. Our own personal flowering. The more we visit it, the more interested in it we will become. And the more it will reward us. Just as a flower gardener exhibits an awareness that notices all sorts of needs of his plants—water, mulch, sunlight, the transformed individual becomes more sensitive to his inner self—and to others as well.

A new plant (idea) will bloom only slightly perhaps on its first emerging. The next time it blooms you may see several more than a single bud opening up. Subsequent blossomings may reveal an evergreen perennial full of beauty, rewarding us each time we visit it.

Visiting the garden, paying attention to it, really looking and seeing is the only fertilizer it needs. Simply pay attention—take time to be quiet, to have paper and pencil ready, and ideas will emerge, sometimes tumbling out on top of each other like a virtual computer bouquet.

In our garden we find nourishment for the gifts of the Spirit we’ve been given—those gifts of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. What we find in our garden is the ability to nourish ourselves with these gifts and then nourish others with them as well.

Our inner garden is indeed secret. Our garden of spiritual delights. We may want others to appreciate its loveliness but they cannot. All we can do is describe what we are seeing, albeit obliquely and in limited terms—none of which do justice to the pleasure and excitement our garden gives us. All we can do is encourage others to do the necessary in order for their own garden to appear.

Going Around in Circles

If we could change ourselves into the calm, creative, life loving persons we want to be, we would have already done just that. Who doesn’t want to feel peaceful, guilt-free, productive? Getting what we want is not so easy. No matter how often we bombard ourselves with affirmations. No matter how many good deeds we do to assuage our guilt. No matter how many craft classes we enroll in.

If we could consciously, with our own will power, change what we want to change in and around us, we would miss what is even better. We would think our rationality is the best thing we have going for us and never open ourselves to the full resources of the unconscious.

Joseph. C. Pearce says that all the creativity we individually and collectively manifest is but about 5% of what the unconscious can produce in us. Imagine! And feelings of guilt and low self-esteem are simply the garbage we have collected which keeps the unconscious from emerging into our consciousness with its power.

We need not fear that giving our Inner Wisdom permission to do what is necessary to eliminate the garbage is going to leave us unmotivated and without direction. (One Christian friend of mine told me he was convinced that without guilt he wouldn’t get out of bed in the morning.) On the contrary, with the garbage removed, our original self emerges—curious, creative, and able to be totally present in the moment so that life in its fullness can be experienced.

The collective confessions and petitions of a religious worship service will not serve, however, as the necessary engagement of our head and heart in genuine dialogue with our innermost self. Each must find his own way, initiate his own conversation. At least, that was my experience.

Testing Our Inner Wisdom

If there is any doubt that you have an Inner Wisdom dedicated to your well-being, consider the following:

–Think of an incident when a creative idea or humorous response erupted from your mouth without seeming to have passed through your mind’s judging facility.

–Remember an occasion when you felt the need to call someone only to hear the phone ringing as he called you.

–Recall some problem you tried to solve, working at it long and hard, only to find when you gave up that the problem seemed to solve itself.

All these are glimpses of the enormous inner resource at our disposal, ready to make our being playful, creative, compassionate. Inner Wisdom is part of the vast unconscious part of our personality. Its powers are benevolent. It does have, however, a mind of its own. It cannot be coerced into following the dictates of our will, but it is ready to serve us well when we are ready to cooperate.

Consider a test:
Tell your Inner Wisdom you want to want to do something. Something you have not been able to make yourself do or want to do. This is different from “Help me do___.” Wanting to want to do something is asking our Wisdom Energy to give us the impetus that makes us want to do some task that needs tackling.

Pick something you’ve put off—something you dreaded beginning, something you’ve not been able to make yourself finish, something you wish you had never committed to. Consciously say, if you can mean it, that you want to want to do that thing. And then let go of it. Chances are in the not too distant future you’ll have a surprise.